TruckerFun.com

As I walked down the busy sidewalk with my wife, knowing I was late for Mass, my eye fell upon one of those unfortunate, ragged vagabonds that are found in every city these days.

Some people turned to stare. Others quickly looked away as if the sight would somehow contaminate them.

Recalling my old pastor, Father Mike, who always admonished me to “care for the sick, feed the hungry and clothe the naked,” I was moved by some powerful inner urge to reach out to this unfortunate person.

Wearing what can only be described as rags, carrying her treasured worldly possessions in two plastic bags, my heart was touched by this person’s condition.

Yes, where some people saw only rags, I saw a true, hidden beauty.

A small voice inside my head called out, “Reach out, reach out and touch this person!”

So I did.  I won’t be at Mass this week.

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As a trucker stops for a red light, a blonde  catches up.  She jumps out of her car, runs up to his truck,  and knocks on the door.  The trucker lowers the window, and  she says “Hi, my name is Heather and you are losing  some of your load.”  The trucker ignores her and proceeds down the street.

When the truck stops for another red light, the girl  catches up again.She jumps out of her car, runs up and knocks  on the door.  Again, the trucker lowers the window. As if  they’ve never spoken, the blonde says brightly, “Hi my  name is Heather, and you are losing some of your load!”

Shaking his head, the  trucker ignores her again and continues  down the street.

At the third red light, the same thing happens again. All  out of breath, the blonde gets out of her car, runs up, knocks  on the truck door. The trucker rolls down the window. Again  she says “Hi, my name is Heather, and you are losing some of  your load!”

When the light turns green the trucker revs up and races  to the next light.  When he stops this time, he hurriedly gets  out of the truck, and runs back to the blonde. He knocks on  her window, and after she lowers it, he says…”Hi, my name is  Chuck , it’s winter in West Virginia and I’m driving the SALT TRUCK!”

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Always check your child’s homework before they go to school.

Mommy actually works at Home Depot, she was selling a shovel.

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The economy has a lot of people in need of some cold hard cash, myself included.  With the holidays right around the corner and my wallet is feeling the pinch.

I’ve got 2 phones I’d like to sell.

1. Like new Nokia camera phone (4.1 mega pixels) - $50
2. Nokia camera phone with vibrating alert (older model) - $20

Take a gander at the pictures below and definitely let me know if you’d be interested.  If you’ve already got a great camera phone please check with your friends and see if they might be interested.

Thanks and keep me in mind when your doing your Christmas shopping.

Nokia camera phone (like-new)

Nokia camera phone with vibrating alert

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From: Jane Gilles
Date: Wednesday 8 Oct 2008 12.19pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Overdue account

Dear David,
Our records indicate that your account is overdue by the amount of $233.95. If you have already made this payment please contact us within the next 7 days to confirm payment has been applied to your account and is no longer outstanding.

Yours sincerely, Jane Gilles
From: David Thorne
Date: Wednesday 8 Oct 2008 12.37pm
To: Jane Gilles
Subject: Re: Overdue account

Dear Jane,
I do not have any money so am sending you this drawing I did of a spider instead. I value the drawing at $233.95 so trust that this settles the matter.

Regards, David.

From: Jane Gilles
Date: Thursday 9 Oct 2008 10.07am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Overdue account

Dear David,
Thankyou for contacting us. Unfortunately we are unable to accept drawings as payment and your account remains in arrears of $233.95. Please contact us within the next 7 days to confirm payment has been applied to your account and is no longer outstanding.

Yours sincerely, Jane Gilles
From: David Thorne
Date: Thursday 9 Oct 2008 10.32am
To: Jane Gilles
Subject: Re: Overdue account

Dear Jane,
Can I have my drawing of a spider back then please.

Regards, David.
From: Jane Gilles
Date: Thursday 9 Oct 2008 11.42am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Overdue account

Dear David,
You emailed the drawing to me. Do you want me to email it back to you?

Yours sincerely, Jane Gilles
From: David Thorne
Date: Thursday 9 Oct 2008 11.56am
To: Jane Gilles
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Overdue account

Dear Jane,

Yes please.

Regards, David.
From: Jane Gilles
Date: Thursday 9 Oct 2008 12.14pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Overdue account

Attached

From: David Thorne
Date: Friday 10 Oct 2008 09.22am
To: Jane Gilles
Subject: Whose spider is that?

Dear Jane, Are you sure this drawing of a spider is the one I sent you? This spider only has seven legs and I do not feel I would have made such an elementary mistake when I drew it.

Regards, David.
From: Jane Gilles
Date: Friday 10 Oct 2008 11.03am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Whose spider is that?

Dear David, Yes it is the same drawing. I copied and pasted it from the email you sent me on the 8th. David your account is still overdue by the amount of $233.95. Please make this payment as soon as possible.

Yours sincerely, Jane Gilles
From: David Thorne
Date: Friday 10 Oct 2008 11.05am
To: Jane Gilles
Subject: Automated Out of Office Response

Thankyou for contacting me. I am currently away on leave, traveling through time and will be returning last week.

Regards, David.
From: David Thorne
Date: Friday 10 Oct 2008 11.08am
To: Jane Gilles
Subject: Re: Re: Whose spider is that?

Hello, I am back and have read through your emails and accept that despite missing a leg, that drawing of a spider may indeed be the one I sent you. I realise with hindsight that it is possible you rejected the drawing of a spider due to this obvious limb ommission but did not point it out in an effort to avoid hurting my feelings. As such, I am sending you a revised drawing with the correct number of legs as full payment for any amount outstanding. I trust this will bring the matter to a conclusion.

Regards, David.

From: Jane Gilles
Date: Monday 13 Oct 2008 2.51pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Whose spider is that?

Dear David, As I have stated, we do not accept drawings in lei of money for accounts outstanding. We accept cheque, bank cheque, money order or cash. Please make a payment this week to avoid incurring any additional fees.

Yours sincerely, Jane Gilles
From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 13 Oct 2008 3.17pm
To: Jane Gilles
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Whose spider is that?

I understand and will definately make a payment this week if I remember. As you have not accepted my second drawing as payment, please return the drawing to me as soon as possible. It was silly of me to assume I could provide you with something of completely no value whatsoever, waste your time and then attach such a large amount to it.

Regards, David.
From: Jane Gilles
Date: Tuesday 14 Oct 2008 11.18am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Whose spider is that?

Attached

I don’t know about you but I would have been crying my freaking eyes out.

“Just jumped outta gear”

What an ass!

There are individuals in this world who should never ever be allowed behind the wheel of any type of mechanical device.  Here are just a few of them.  Enjoy and stay the hell away from them!

A team of archeologist in Washington DC has uncovered the 10,000 year old bones & fossil remains of what is believed to be the first Politician.

I really like the way this guy puts things into perspective. I would love to send someone a rejection letter like this.

The stupidity of teenagers never ceases to amaze me. These teenagers piled up in a black Nissan truck are beyond retarded. I really like the attention they give to the stop sign.